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*Aegidius Ahenobarbus Julius Agricola de Hammo was a man who lived in the midmost parts of the island of Britain. People were richly endowed with names in those days, now long ago. There was more time then, and folk were fewer, so that most were distinguished. However, those days are now over, so I will give the man his name shortly: he was Farmer Giles of Ham, and he had a red beard. Ham was only a village, but villages were proud and independent still in those days.
 
*Aegidius Ahenobarbus Julius Agricola de Hammo was a man who lived in the midmost parts of the island of Britain. People were richly endowed with names in those days, now long ago. There was more time then, and folk were fewer, so that most were distinguished. However, those days are now over, so I will give the man his name shortly: he was Farmer Giles of Ham, and he had a red beard. Ham was only a village, but villages were proud and independent still in those days.
 
*Farmer Giles had a dog. The dog's name was Garm. Dogs had to be content with short names in the vernacular: the Book-latin was reserved for their betters. Garm could not talk even dog-latin; but he could use the vulgar tongue either to bully or to brag or to wheedle in. Bullying was for beggars and trespassers, bragging for other dogs, and wheedling for his master.
 
*Farmer Giles had a dog. The dog's name was Garm. Dogs had to be content with short names in the vernacular: the Book-latin was reserved for their betters. Garm could not talk even dog-latin; but he could use the vulgar tongue either to bully or to brag or to wheedle in. Bullying was for beggars and trespassers, bragging for other dogs, and wheedling for his master.
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*The time was not one of hurry or bustle. But bustle has very little to do with business. [People] did their work without it; and they got through a deal both of work and of talk. There was plenty to talk about, for memorable events occurred very frequently. But at the moment, nothing memorable had, in fact, happened in Ham for quite a long time. Which suited Farmer Giles down to the ground: he was a slow sort of fellow, rather set in his ways, and taken up with his own affairs. He had his hands full (he said) keeping the wolf from the door: that is, keeping himself as fat and comfortable as his father before him. The dog was busy helping him. Neither of them gave much thought to the Wide World outside their fields, the village, and the nearest market.
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